cny break

this cny break has been the one and only break i have been looking forward to after FLV. this break is mainly a mug-my-ass-off period. a time for me to catch up on my seriously lagging work. considering that i started to skip morning lectures due to my lazy backbone and the pile of untouched tutorials on my sister's bed, i really mean business this time round.

all work and no play makes karen a dull girl. not forgetting to have fun with friends during this cny. going around doing house visiting, getting to know my friends one step further especially my nj friends. laughing at goi's baby photos and realising that one's future isnt a predestinated thing. wow-ing at tiong's huge and pretty house and drooling over his youngest brother. haha.. i guess the best part for me was going back to nj to visit ms ling. no matter how much i detest the school, we all love the familarity we get when we stepped into the school. the running track where we sweated and bled for napfa, students involved in all kinds of after-school activities (sports, dancing, slacking around in the cantenn, CCA) brought back fond memories. i love the feeling of going back to school to chat with a trcher whom i truly repect. talking about the good old days together, and updating each other with our lives, although ms ling had not been very tactful with her words that day, we all love her! =)

while, on the eve of cny eve, nj frens gave me a huge and pleasant surprise. so much of a high-class resturant right? luckily i din fall into their trick completely but i was damn angry and sad over that lousy pair of heels. damn it! to put that aside, the highlight was their sweet revenge. haha.. dingod's tiramisu still rocks the most and it ended literally in a high note with a bottle of white wine.


our dinner


tiong's ugly hair (my sweet revenge!)


dingod's tiramisu. yummy!!!!


my birthday cake


the white wine


trying to open the white wine


us with royce and white wine


goi has rashes!!!


because of the white wine


us


us again


us again again


final shot! =)

on a sad note, this cny taught me the harsh reality of life - the world is unfair. all of us lead a different life. you cant compare with others because deep down in your heart, you know you are a loser. you try so hard to make things a little better for yourself and everyone but there is always someone who will give you hope and destroy the hope simultaneously. you thought things will take a gd change but everything is just a illusion. it goes against what you want and it does not tally with your upbringings. you start to question yourself are your efforts worthwhile? you dont want to be defeated. you keep telling yourself to push on but will history repeat itself? there is nothing you can do. everything is just not within your abilities yet. positive energy starts to leave your body sliently, leaving you with nothing to fight. you start to give up and not hope for anything.

purposeful

i am inspired by people who live their lives with a purpose. i hate to do anything aimlessly. i need a target. i want a goal. they give me the drive and power to live. although my efforts may be wasted in the end, i love the feeling of being alive again. i want to keep myself busy, constantly on my toes. i need that strength. i dont want to waste my time going in circles to search for the answer i am looking for. i want and need a purpose in life.

FLV first gathering

FLV had our first gathering after the event. went to holland village and we went drinking! my liquer ban is officially over. yeah!!! but before that, dinner with liting last night.


our dinner


liting!!!!


Fest La Vie


pretty stage


our host


at holland v


second grp at holland v


wala wala


they are drunk!!!


cheers! =)


look at mybay!!!!!


we had drank too much


happy faces =)

food for thought why do people change?

FEST LA VIE and my BIRTHDAY!!!

Fest La Vie 07 was a hit!

the whole experience was tiring yet rewarding. we had endless meetings till 11pm on alternate nights before the event and i had to combine both lunch and dinner together for those nights. damn sad for my poor stomach. for the past 2 days, i only had a total of 2.5 hours of sleep during the event. i am such a heavy workaholic that i stayed up on the first night to finish the slides presentation. given the lack of sleep mindset, it was extremely energy draining for me to be on high alert for 4 hours straight during the event. however, all our hard work was paid off. i heard pple say they had never seen such a huge crowd of pple at central forum before. we had the first auction ever held in nus. the wonderful hosts and entertaining performers made our event even more successful.

furthermore, i got to know the committee much better. we had a new member - prog's gd friend, rubbish woman, my new lover, and most importantly, my fellow prog cellmate! CH is a damn strong guy, slacker and gian peng. FLV was fun partly because of the wonderful programme cell. the 4 of us (goi, dabai, ch and i) could get along very well, having fun together during meetings and not forgetting our favourite activity, banging each other. go to the V at central forum and you will get what i mean.

i was talking to goi today about FLV and we realised how much we miss FLV. although i am seriously lagging behind in my schoolwork because of FLV, we want to continue to work for FLV 07. i guess we are just suffering from post event sickness.

one day after FLV was my 20th birthday!!! yeah!!! i had finally reached the big 2! seriously, the age does not bother me now. sadly, i had a lab session on my birthday till 5pm. anyway, i had a simple dinner with my parents outside. this year, my birthday was a simple and quiet affair. in fact, i like it that way. i dont want to spend my birthday partying or drinking thru the night with friends till i puke. i am happy to know that my family and friends remember my bday. that's enough.

due to the lack of sleep, i actually fell asleep in front of the TV after my dinner. i woke up at 10pm sharp to catch my show and then my door bell rang. i thot it was some neighbour and i was too lazy to bother who he/she was. after that, i saw mh, goi, hq and dabai. they bought a bday cake and heinken. thanks guys for making the trip down. pleasant surprise again! =)

today, went to botak jones at clementi to have dinner with liting. i haven seen this girl for sometime and she still looks the same. we started talking about our common friends and we realised how much we care for jiefang, and how much we misses pee. it is just wonderful to know that secondary friends are still by your side after so many years. love them lots!

jiefang, my first time celebrating my birthday without you since we have been friends. it is a very STRANGE feeling. i shall call you soon!!! pick up my call. =)

she is proud of me

i love to see the smile on her face. i feel pleased with myself, knowing that she is proud of her daughter. i understand the pain she has went through to bring me up. the bond between us grows stronger. i tell myself that although reality has not been kind to me, everything is worth it. it warms my heart to know that she cares and loves me. i wish i could be that welcoming and open as her to others.

There's nothing you can do that can't be done.
Nothing you can sing that can't be sung.
Nothing you can say but you can learn how to play the game
It's easy.
There's nothing you can make that can't be made.
No one you can save that can't be saved.
Nothing you can do but you can learn how to be in time
It's easy.

rain rain rain

it is a cold night today. the day after tomorrow brought my mood to a new low level. i started to hug my pillow and think about a lot of stuff. how did things turn sour btw us? can there be any amendments? where should i go from here? will i end up living against what my dreams? i know these questions have no answers.

how i wish tomorrow is a weekend or holiday. i want to drink a cup of hot milo, listen to my slow songs playlist on my ipod and read my favourite book - kite runner. i want to spend the night quietly by myself in my cosy warm bedroom. i want to immerse myself into every single second of my life. dont wake me up from this dream, just let me sleep.

with a bang!

today is the first day of the hectic sem2 because the ever-clever me decided to start 6 modules in this sem. seriously, i dont have much time left during the weekdays. so friends, let's meet up on weekends okay?

although it was the first day back to the 8 to 5 routine, i was not relunctant or unhappy about it the day before or today. i am quite happy about it actually because finally it is time to move my engine again. like what goi said, i am a workaholic. anyway, the best part about this first day in school was i started off with a SMASH!!!

my dear FAT is leaving for canada in about 8 hours' time. this time round, her break was ultra short. it lasted for only 20 days!!! omg! how am i supposed to spend quality time with her? i din even go to her hse to slack our afternoons away, which was our favourite hobbies. anyway, she planned this pleasant surprise for me.

it was our first year as friends not celebrating my bday with me. it is kinda sad but it is okay cos we had an early bday celebrations today, right before lecture. i was kept in the dark and i had to say, those guys can really keep a secret. i was shocked to see eve and even worse, they threw me a cake full of whip cream on the top. worst still, i had to dig the candles out from that white mess with my mouth! from that moment onwards, i knew i would not be clean anymore. true enough, mh, my dearest ally smashed that foamy cake into my face!!! omg! in the end, i smelt of whip cream the whole day and nobody esp goi dared to stay near me. =( that cake is my 20th present cos the guys prepared 19 different presents for me. =) it is the BIG 2!!! and my bday is not even here yet.

the most happening thing is i just got home from wala wala. can u imagine students drinking on their first day of school?! i was not drunk but high. 3 bottles of beer and a huge plate of potato wedges for just 49 bucks. omg! happy hours should be my new friend. however, it is time to hold my drinking sessions. i shall try to drink less in this new year and destroyed the alcoholic image i had built last year. i dont want to end up in some consultations where i have to say, "hi! my name is karen and i am a alcoholic,". NO! i dont want to end up like that. besides, drinking will make me fat and so it is time for some exercise too!! i shall go swimming next wed since wed is my free day! =)

i just want to thank everyone which made my first day of sem2 such a special one! thanks for all the smashing, buying of sparkling juice, waking up early to buy the cheesecake, spending money and time on the 19 presents and making an effort to rmb this special day. thanks guys!!! i finally knew how great friends can be. on a last note, FAT, you should be in canada when you are reading this. hope everything will be fine for you in this sem and rmb our date in taipei! =) 2nd day in morning and it is a morning lecture. omhg!!! hopefully i will be in time.

2007

it is the third day of the brand new year 2007. yeah!!! i am still very excited over the new year. a new year means a brand new start. everything starts from scatch. i shall start studying real hard when school starts. all studying but no play makes karen a dull girl. although i maybe busy with my crazy timetable, please date me okay? i seriously dont want to spend every single second of the next 4 months in a library mugging away.

furthermore, i need to start saving lots of money. i shall not blog about the reasons because this will be a negative entry then. i just need to save money to first, go on a travelling trip with jf and kns in may. second, hopefully to start my long-awaited driving lesson. third, overseas exchange prog. lastly, braces. i dont have courage to pierce my ears but i have it to want to put braces on. interesting ya?

i want to go shopping but i am tired, lazy and sick of the crowds. i shall rest at home for a whole day and go shopping again. i hate people! i hate sales!!!

rainy days

mark the date down!! it did not rain a single drop of water today and i amazing lasted through a 5 hours meeting with just a slice of bread in my stomach. rainy days spolit everything. my shoes are wet, i dare not to wear jeans when i am out, my clothes are taking FOREVER to dry and i just hate to be outdoors. so what can i do?

imagine myself cuddling into my bed with my comfortable blanket all the way up to my neck and reading a real good book like tuesday with morris. not forgetting a warm yummy big cup of milo at my desk. how about oasis or coldplay songs playing in my CD player too? i love it! this is my perfect way to spend a rainy day. how i wish life can be that worry-less. i dont really have to care about my surroundings except to focus on one thing.

i just need a day to slow things down a little.

MERRY CHRISTMAS

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

christmas is always the time to get together with friends and family. obviously, i wont miss this chance to spread a little love to people around me and watched love actually and pig out with KNS on xmas eve. hahaha..


weifang, bay and i


our lunch


goi and i


bday boy


dingod, tiong and hq


playing with chilli?


goi drinking her milk tea


hq with his beef noodles


his present!!!!


my weird finger


yummy cakes


our favourite


refuse to take photo


laughing fits


all of us


all 5

the curse of the golden flower

everything has its own laws. when you cross over them, misfortunate will befall upon you.

i understand the importance of having guidelines to follow and rules to abid to but why cant they be flexible at time? we are living in a give and take environment. for example on a crowded bus, although you give up your seat to someone who needs it more than you do, you earn a simple thank you who has the ability to warm your heart. as you grow older, you may have lost contacts with old friends, but you have learnt the importance of friendship. if that is the case, why cant there be any room for compromise? must it always be a head-to-head situation?

dont fight for anything that is not meant to be yours. people believe that everything is pre-planned but i refuse to. everything on earth has to be earned. you cant command respect but you can earn respect. money does not fall from the sky. grades need to be mugged for. it maybe a long and painful battle, but if i can get what i want ultimately, why not? so the question now is does the means justify the ends?

have you ever done something that you know it is wrong? i believe all of us have made a wrong decision in our lives and suffered from a fall before. the main point is what is it that drives us to make the wrong decision? irrational thinking, perphas. things may have turned out better if we could pause, think for a moment and calm ourselves. no guilt and no regrets will be the ideal case.

i have been out with my usual different groups of friends recently. photos will be out soon. sorry for scaring all today. jieFAT is back in town!

rain!!!

where does all the water come from? it has been raining continuously for 2 days and it is STILL raining while i am typing this entry. i dont detest rainy day but there is a limit to everything! too many rainy days make me lazy. i refuse to go out and get myself all wet. i just want to laze around at home and wrapped myself up like a cocoon in my bed. just leave me alone and let me hibernate.

i was supposed to watch flags of our fathers yesterday but the weather put me off. in the end, the guys came over to my house to have steamboat. steaming hot steamboat and a glass bottle of cold stella. woah! perfect combination. i shall start to control my drinking. everyone is saying that i am drinking too much. shit!

rain rain go away! i want to go blading on friday.

love hate relationship

as christmas draws near, i start to panic. i am NOT done with my christmas shopping yet. my legs are aching and my shoulder hurts after my first christmas shopping today. damn sad to see the numbers in my bank account decreasing. it is even more painful to realise that the money that i have spent on are not for myself. argH!! anywhere, i have to make another trip down again. hopefully everything will be settled by then. after all these rushings, i shall just treat myself to spend an entire day at home.

crap!

i am feeling damn crappy now. i dont know what has got into me? nobody have pissed me off if i do not take into account what happened during lunch today. whatever!

yup, the star awards was on TV an hour ago but seriously, i could not sit in front of my TV and watch the full 3 hours plus show. i gave up and changed to prison break. how can i resist wentworth miller?

however, looking at a pretty face does not make me feel any better. instead, i got more pissed with one of the characters in the show. wth! i just cant understand why some people will go all out just to achieve their aims? they dont care about what happened to the people around them at all! all they care about is themselves. they want this they want that. a clean record, recognition, power, position. shit! why cant people learn to be contended with their lives? why must there be a crazy race for material wants? argH! when did i start hating urban life?

ling's wedding

something happening over the last weekend

MISS LING'S WEDDING!!!!!


s14


me, sweeling and wenting

me and hurry hurry

me, goi and jaja

me, goi, jaja and hq

hq and me

hq, me, goi, jess and jr

with ms ho